Today, let’s dig deeper into something that I notice again and again with many single ladies.
We say we want a man in our life, we say we want a beautiful, fulfilling, happy relationship – yet, we keep sabotaging ourselves in subtle but powerful ways.
I identified the four most common ways in which single women push love away. Does any of this ring true for you?
1) You’re not dating.
I understand you have fears. I understand you’ve had some terrible experiences with some awful people out there.
But here’s the thing, my lovely: Husbands and soulmates don’t fall from the roofs. We have to date if we want to find our “one.”
If online dating is not for you, get out of the house and show up in social places – bars, sports events, men’s clothing stores. Show up where men can SEE you. Make it easier for him, your one, to spot you and come find you.
2) You don’t take responsibility for your part in the love finding process.
It’s soooo much easier to blame external circumstances. It’s easier to say “men are weird, men are all about sex, men are this and men are that”… OR “my childhood was like this or that and that’s why I don’t want to do this or that”!
And, while I have full compassion for those hardships, and of course what you’ve been through is no cake walk, it’s just so much more productive to move on IN SPITE of those reasons, or at least get professional help to move on.
It’s also much harder to do this – because then we need to take a hard look at what we’re bringing to the table, instead of placing the blame on the outside. But it’s also sooo much more constructive.
I know, through first hand experience, that I created what I have today, and no, I don’t consider myself to be lucky. I worked hard on myself, very, very hard.
I don’t generally talk about my childhood here – not because I don’t want to, but because it doesn’t have any meaning for me today.
All I can say is that, in spite of the hardships, I moved on, I took responsibility for my part, I took action and I created what I so desired.
3) You’re not doing the “inner work” that is needed to bring love in.
Inner work is hard work. It can feel so hard to face our demons. We’d rather keep escaping our fears than feel them.
But if we don’t face those demons, if we don’t work through our fears and limiting beliefs, they run our lives literally, and never let us move forward.
Also, I am the biggest proponent of the “right skills in love”, because I am the biggest example of a woman who learned this work and wasn’t born with the feminine / diva skill set.
I truly believe we can ALL have the love we desire, IF we learn the right skills.
That is why I believe so much in “doing the work” and not escaping it or postponing it. Yes, you want to throw up when a good man gives you attention (I hear you my dear) but if you choose not to do anything about it, you’re going to be stuck in that toxic choosing pattern for years and years and would that help you? My guess is, it wouldn’t.
4) You say “now is not the right time”.
Ebook next month, program next year, private coaching the year after. 3 years of your life gone, and nothing changes, because “now” is never the time you choose to act, while you keep doing what you’ve always been doing.
It doesn’t work, and you get more and more disappointed and less and less hopeful about anything working out for you.
Don’t let this happen to you. “NOW” is always the BEST time to do whatever we want to do, NOW is the best time to take that step forward, now is the best time to empower yourself with the love skills that work.
I hope that within you – you too will find the courage to move forward and if not, then please let me know and I am here to support you.
I have so many resources available on my website for you to start with a baby step TODAY:
1) My short and powerful introduction to feminine energy ebook which will be your best friend in dating and make you a dating goddess: www.samiwunder.com/ebook
2) My diva self love and feminine energy affirmations to help you connect with your diva energy and feel like a million bucks before a date or before that critical interview:
3) My Attract Your Soulmate audio program which is an in depth inner work + dating skills downloadable audio course that will help you attract your one: samiwunder.com/attract-your-soulmate-program/
Lastly, if after reading this, you find yourself still feeling afraid, unable to move on, unable to take action and just DIVE in and take that first step, please write to me personally.
Love’s waiting! Give it a chance.