In this blog I am going to show you how to use your emotional attraction to repair your relationship.
If you’re like most couples, you may think that physical attraction is the most important part in your romantic relationship.
But what happens when the physical attraction starts to fade?
Is that the end of your relationship? Well, that’s where emotional attraction comes in and gives fun, meaning and longevity to long-term relationships and can help repair your relationship with your man.
Emotional attraction is the glue that keeps a romantic relationship together, even when the physical attraction is not as strong or fresh as it once was.
In fact, in my years of experience as an international relationship coach, focusing on building emotional attraction in order to repair a relationship that has started to feel flat is one of the biggest missing pieces of the puzzle in the health of so many romantic relationships and yet so often ignored.
Many women are simply not educated in the benefits of emotional attraction and hence not using it to repair their relationship and frankly, missing out on the power of this magical ingredient in all long-term relationships.
What is Emotional Attraction?
Emotional attraction is the connection that you feel with your man, based on shared values, beliefs, experiences and interests.
It’s the feeling that you get when you’re around someone who just “gets” you and understands you. You feel comfortable being yourself around them, and you can talk about anything with them, without fear of judgment or rejection.
On that note, I want to invite you to take a moment and check in with yourself.
Would you say you have this feeling right now in your marriage or relationship? The feeling that you and your man feel seen, heard and understood in your relationship or marriage?
I know I have this feeling with my husband Chris and it is the thing that keeps us going, through intense personal times like pregnancies, childbirth, sleepless nights with the babies and so on.
Without emotional attraction, our relationship would have just fallen apart because trust me, there are times in a romantic relationship or marriage where your level of patience will be tested and the physical attraction will be low due to factors outside of your control like sickness, babies, work stress etc.
This is where emotional attraction comes in and becomes the foundation of a healthy, romantic relationship that lasts.
Emotional attraction is different from physical attraction in that it’s not based on someone’s body appearance or physical characteristics.
It’s based on the connection that you feel With a man or your man feels with you, on a deeper, Emotional level.
This connection is what keeps a relationship strong and resilient, even in the face of challenges and obstacles which everyday life will inevitably bring to all relationships.
For example, in early days of a relationship, you may feel like you constantly feel drawn physically to your partner.
However, as time passes, that physical attraction may start to settle down and this is where emotional attraction enters the picture.
Why Is Emotional Attraction Important In My Work?
In my work, as a leading international dating and relationship coach, I put a lot of emphasis on women learning about building emotional attraction with empowered, masculine men because I truly believe it’s the foundation of every healthy relationship.
Without it, a relationship is likely to suffer from a lack of intimacy, depth, and meaning and not likely to survive challenging times.
So often, my clients tend to be celebrities or highly successful professional women and while they have learnt to pay attention to their looks and bodies, they still have to educate themselves on learning how to incorporate emotional attraction in their romantic relationships and marriages.
But once they do, they are truly unstoppable when it comes to the depth of relationships and attraction they can create and experience in their partnerships.
Here are some of the reasons why emotional attraction is so crucial and why you want to learn how to cultivate more of it in your partnership
1) It Helps You Grow Together As a couple
Emotional attraction is the key to growing together as a couple.
When you have a deep emotional connection with someone, you’re more likely to be open and vulnerable with them.
This vulnerability allows you to share your hopes, dreams, and fears with your partner, which can help you both grow and develop as individuals.
So often when relationships fall apart, it is because the couple had stopped sharing with each other and growing emotionally together.
This does tend to happen for some of my high achieving clients where the work stress and business takes over the relationship.
Before you know, she and her man are starting to feel emotionally distant and moving in different directions because there’s not enough emotional sharing and connection going on in the relationship.
2) It Keeps The Spark Alive In the bedroom
Physical attraction is important in a relationship, but it’s not enough to keep the spark alive over the long term.
In fact, if I may be bold to say but my experience, both personally and as an experienced coach has shown that it is the deep interest in someone emotionally that will keep the spark alive in the bedroom too.
When this goes missing (and it often does), that’s when you start having issues in the bedroom too.
The truth is that emotional attraction is what keeps a relationship exciting and interesting, even after years of being together and has the power to repair a failing relationship quickly.
When you have a strong emotional connection with a man, you’re more likely to continue to learn and discover new things about each other, which can help keep the relationship fresh and exciting and keep things hot in the bedroom too.
For example, my client Serena who took my ‘Building Emotional Attraction Course for Women in Relationships’ as together with her partner for five years and had started to feel like the spark was fading.
They were still physically attracted to each other, but they weren’t connecting on an emotional level.
Serena realized that they needed to work on their emotional attraction, so she used my tips in the program and implemented many positive changes in her relationship that I recommend inside my instantly downloadable video program, teaching women how to build emotional connection with their men.
One of these recommendations was to start asking her partner questions about his childhood and his dreams for the future. It was amazing to watch how her man went from cold and quiet to opening up to Serena like a talkative little boy.
Before she knew it, the wine was flowing, the hot touch and flirting was back and she didn’t even have to try hard to make anything happen.
Honestly, I am still sometimes amazed at the power of these small tweaks that make such a huge difference in the love lives of my clients.
I find that working on cultivating the skill of emotional attraction with your partner pays back much more than investing in a sexy lingerie.
3) It Leads To Meaningful Conversations
One of the most important aspects of emotional attraction is the ability to have deep, meaningful conversations with your partner. Cultivating this skill in your relationship will both fulfill you and him.
When you have a strong emotional connection with your man, you’re more likely to be able to talk about the things that really matter, like your hopes, dreams, insecurities and fears.
These conversations can help you both gain a deeper understanding of each other and can help you grow as individuals and as a couple.
For example, my client Jenny and her partner had been together for three years and had always had a strong physical connection, but they didn’t always have deep, meaningful conversations. This meant that Jenny’s man often sought that emotional connection in his other friends.
Jenny realized that they needed to work on their emotional attraction but she did not know where and how to start. Hence, she dived into my instantly downloadable, ‘Building Emotional Attraction’ video training program where I give you easy to apply tricks, tools and strategies to start building emotional attraction and connection with your partner straight away.
Literally starting tonight or as soon as you dive in.
Jenny’s progress has been phenomenal. Her man now would rather spend the evening talking to her vs. hanging out with the lads with beer and getting drunk. Her relationship and connection has reached new heights that she never thought was possible for her.
4. It Creates A Sense of Security & Irreplaceability
When you have a deep emotional connection with your man, you feel secure in your relationship with him. You know him, you get him and honestly you become irreplaceable to him.
You know that your partner understands you and accepts you for who you are, which can help you feel more confident and secure in your relationship.
This security can help you both feel more comfortable taking risks and trying new things, which can help keep your relationship strong and healthy.
What Happens When You Don't Have Emotional Attraction In Your Relationship?
Here are just a few of the problems that can arise and that you may be experiencing already in your relationship –
When you don’t have emotional attraction in your relationship, it can lead to a number of issues.
1) You may feel like you’re growing apart
Without emotional attraction, it’s easy to start feeling like you’re growing apart from your partner. You may start to feel like you and him are on different paths.
2) You and him may start searching for emotional connection elsewhere
What we don´t get in our own relationship, we seek outside.
If you or your man are missing emotional connection, there can be a tendency to look for that connection outside of your relationship.
3) The spark in the bedroom will die
When you have nothing to say to each other that is of value and interest, it is possible that this will start reflecting in the spark in the bedroom. So many times, women try harder to lose weight and buy sexy clothes to revive the spark, without understanding that the true key to that spark lies in building emotional connection with their man. When you do that, the rest just comes back.
My clients have told us that this stuff works like magic, even though it’s not magic.
It is simply based on emotional intelligence and a keen understanding of how the male mind works and what it truly craves to experience inside a long-term relationship.
If you decide to invest in the program, I cannot wait to hear your results from it.
It is going to be single-handedly one of the best things you can ever do for your marriage or partnership. I know this for sure!
Dedicated to your success in love,
Sami xx