How to write an online dating profile that stands out to high-quality men is a skills that any woman can learn. And it’s a very necessary skill to perfect especially right now, with online dating being the ONLY avenue for singles around the world, suck in quarantine or isolation, to meet new potential partners.
In my last article, I was arguing that your dreams of grand love do not need to come to a screeching halt, despite the current situation in the world.
In this article, I’m sharing my top 7 practical, expert tips on how to write an online dating profile and attract a pool of suitable men, all eager to take you out as soon as social distancing becomes a thing of the past.
Why Your Online Dating Profile Matters
I’ve always been a fan of online dating, and have always encouraged my clients to use it (in fact, over 70% of our successful clients have met their amazing men on an online dating website or app).
Still, here’s what happens a lot: you register on the best dating sites and yet you don’t get noticed. In fact, in spite of being on the best dating websites, you only get clicks by scammers and weird men and start to feel discouraged and frustrated by the whole process.
“What is going on here, Sami?” you ask. “Is there something wrong with me?
Well, here’s what’s going on, in my experience:
It’s not about you, but about the way your online profile writes about you.
In the online world, impressions matter, and if your profile reads like the profile of 10000 other women out there, the probability that a quality man will notice you reduces drastically.
On the other hand, when you know how to write an online dating profile well, when it represents your unique fire and energy, when your soul shines through those written words, quirks and all…
— then your online experience turns overnight, from boring to exciting, from ignored to desired – all in a jiffy!
Tangible results of a well-written online dating profile:
- Getting noticed by quality men;
- Increased number of hits on your profile;
- Increased inflow of messages from quality men;
- Increased response rate to your messages;
- A much higher probability of getting compatible matches online;
- More men to date;
- Better quality men to date;
- Many more dates;
- An increased probability to meet your “one“;
- A higher return on investment on your dating website subscriptions which cost money.
A multitude of concrete benefits!
As you can see, it’s totally worth it to spend some time writing a good profile or investing in a professional to write one for you.
And that’s what I am going to help you with today.
Here are my 7 sure-shot ways to write an online profile that will make you stand out and get quality men to notice you and come knocking at your door
Top 7 Tips On How To Write An Online Dating Profile That Stands Out
Tip 1: Keep It Short
Less is more when it comes to your online profile.
Be true to yourself: Do you actually feel inspired to read page long profiles of men yourself? What you wouldn’t do, don’t expect a man to do either.
Lesson: Keep it short. Remember, he doesn’t have to know everything about your life through your profile. He has to date you to get access to all those juicy details.
So reveal some interesting things about you, but not everything. 5-6 sentences profiles, when well written, do wonders.
Tip 2: Avoid Generic Adjectives
Woman A says she is “fun, passionate and loves dancing”.
Woman B says she is “fun, passionate and loves dancing”.
While woman A’s fun comprises “late night parties“, woman B’s fun comprises “ice skating.“
While woman A loves to dance salsa, woman B is crazy about hip hop and street dancing.
The point I am making here is that these are two completely different women using the same generic adjectives to represent themselves. These generic adjectives are in effect HIDING what makes these women unique.
When your profile doesn’t shine light on what’s unique about you, not only do you attract incompatible matches, you also run the risk of passing off on your soulmate, that Ms. Right FOR YOU.
Why? Because he is simply unable to recognize your uniqueness amongst that bunch of loosely thrown, vague adjectives.
This brings me to the next point: How can you avoid these generic adjectives and let your unique light shine through the written word?
Tip 3: Give Specific Examples
Let’s show you what I mean by demonstrating with Woman A’s profile.
Instead of expressing herself in this “general“ way, she now gives a specific example of what it does to her to dance her favourite dance of Salsa. It could look like:
“I feel alive and like a total diva when I dance Salsa at the local girls club in downtown SF.”
Can you see how the specific example makes Woman A stand out uniquely? You picture her dancing Salsa like a diva at the local girls club in downtown San Francisco, and she draws an exciting picture in your mind.
Who would you want to know at this point?
Woman A, or Woman B with her old “fun, passionate and loves dancing“?
The answer is easy. The more specific you can get, the more you can stand out in a man’s mind and get his mental juices and excitement flowing for you even without having met you.
It works like a subtle, non-sexual mind seduction. Equally effective, and no less powerful than the real thing.
Tip 4: Paint The Picture
When it comes to describing what you want in a man or in a relationship, instead of using loaded adjectives to DESCRIBE what you want, paint the picture of what you desire.
Let’s take an example.
Description Format looks like: “My man should be fun, relaxed and like hiking.“
Painting the picture looks like:
“It would feel so good to sit by the couch, relax with him on a Saturday night while munching popcorn.”
“The idea of going on an adventurous hike up an Appalachian trail with him fills me up with childlike excitement.“
Can you see the difference?
When you just describe what you want, you don’t evoke any feelings within the man reading it because he doesn’t know how these particular adjectives of “relaxed and hiking“ would look like in your life.
When you take the time to paint the picture, you ensure that the man reading your profile is getting a glimpse of what being close to you may feel like to him.
Tip 5: Avoid Demands
Very often, you will find Internet dating gurus giving advice that you should let the men know what you will be expecting from them in the relationship.
I say: Not the best idea, and especially not if it sounds like a demand!
Let’s see some examples and how men would read them.
Woman A: “I like my men to take the lead, to pay on dates and court me during the dating process.“
He probably would pay anyway and would court the lady anyway, but reading that written on a profile makes him go: “Eeeww! Demanding. Not sure I can deliver all of that so strictly.“
Demands make men want to shut down, instead of inspiring them to deliver.
Here’s another example.
Woman B: “It is an absolute must that he want kids and family, because that is what is an imperative for me.“
He probably does want kids and family too, but the way this message is worded feels like too much pressure to deliver. He would rather decide this organically and in conversation with the woman in question.
As a result, he will probably skip contacting woman B.
(But what if kids and family and getting married is an imperative for you? I teach you how and when to bring it up in this article here.)
Tip 6: Avoid Negative Statements
My experience with writing online profiles has led to the recognition of this annoying, but true, golden nugget:
Most men try their luck with an attractive woman anyway.
Negative statements about what you don’t want in a man, or written attempts to disqualify older or creepy men from contacting you will not be very successful.
Just a waste of your precious writing space and word count!
It will also diminish your exciting and upbeat vibe, and make you look low-value before a healthy, quality man.
Examples of negative statements that you should avoid look like:
“Please do not contact if you are looking for hook ups.“
“Men who just want sex, stay out.“
“Please do not send messages like, ‘Hey What’s up?’“
Tip 7: End With A Hook
Close your profile in a way that prods men to take some action.
A hook reads like a subtle invitation to ACT after reading the profile.
It inspires the man reading to send you a message and start some kind of a dialogue with you based on what the hook reads like.
Examples of hooks could look like:
“I can imagine us playing in the water on that Puerto Rican beach. And you? 😉 ”
“I can almost feel you want to know more. Easy then! Just write me ;)”
“And you know what? “After all of that, there’s still so much more 😉 But you’d have to ask me out on a date to know it…. “
Qualities of Good Hooks:
- They are subtle.
- They are positive.
- They are teasing (feel free to wink).
- They inspire to act (not demand or force).
So divas, that’s how to write an online dating profile that gets you noticed!
If you follow those 7 simple (not easy, but simple) guidelines to write your online profile, you are guaranteed to get immediate results!
So You Got Noticed Online. Now What?
To avoid the overwhelm that comes with receiving 100s of messages daily, and to navigate online dating effectively and efficiently, it helps to follow a very SPECIFIC PROCESS, which reduces the time you spend online, and which gets you results (phone calls, real dates) quickly.
This process, that I teach and recommend to my private coaching clients, is laid out extensively in Call 5 of my audio training program, Attract Your Soulmate.
The nuts and bolts of online dating are explored in one full hour of intense, powerful information. This will save you a lot of time and heartache, by teaching you how to easily filter out the low-effort men who are only looking for flings or hook ups.
Once your learn how to write an online dating profile that attracts the attention of men, Attract Your Soulmate is going to empower you for the next steps of real-life dating
Attract Your Soulmate is a complete dating course, which will also help you to:
- Set yourself up for success by adopting the mindset of a real Diva;
- Conquer the negative beliefs that might be keeping you stuck in your love life;
- Understand how men really think about commitment;
- Harness the power of your feminine energy and effortlessly become an attraction magnet;
- Learn what rotational dating is, and how it will prevent you from losing yourself for any one man;
- Prepare for every possible dating situation and scenario;
- Become confident and actually enjoy the dating process.
This audio training program shows how easy it can be, when we have the right knowledge, to attract and keep the love of a quality man.
Attract Your Soulmate has already been a life-changer for dozens of women out there – you can read their experiences on this page.
I wish you tons of luck and success in your love life, and would love to hear back from you on how this is working out for you.
PS: Inspired to transform your love life? Join my tribe on Wunder Divas – my private dating and relationship support group! Hundreds of other amazing women just like you are already in. Find us here.
Sami has been seen on The Daily Mail, The Elephant Journal, The Natural Health Magazine, and The Huffington Post.